Nuit Blanche
by Tayylore
Summary: "Morzan! Oh, I'm glad someone showed up. I - " Eragon's smile swiftly fell when the door closed behind Morzan. Morzan felt dread from witnessing Eragon's reaction. Slowly he turned and pushed on the door. "Don't hurt me!" Eragon exclaimed. He watched Morzan continue trying to get the door open, but there was only failure.


"Welcome to.. Nuit Blanche.."

"Murtagh! You.. You're a waiter?" Morzan managed to ask before laughing hard, tears coming to his eyes as his son's face reddened.

"Booth or table?" Murtagh mumbled.

Elspeth smiled up at him and stated, "A booth is fine." Her husband continued laughing, and she gently kicked at his foot before following Murtagh to a booth beneath a window.

"What the fuck?" Morzan asked when his laughter had calmed, "I thought this was a French place?"

The decor was nothing impressive, and much of it was composed of antlers. Peanut shells littered the floor, and in the distance a birthday song could be heard amidst some "YEE-HAW!"-ing.

"Just the name, Dad. What do you want to drink?" Murtagh inquired.

"I want to know why the hell you're working as a peasant." Morzan said.

"What do you want to drink, Dad?!" Murtagh shouted.

"I want some damn vodka. Don't shout at me, Emo Ass!" Morzan exclaimed.

By this time Mara and Varyana - in their people forms, of course - had taken their places beside their riders.

"I want chocolate milk!" Mara said. Varyana shrugged and ordered water, and Elspeth wanted tea.

Murtagh departed to get their drinks as they analyzed their menus.

"Mara, you are supposed to take the shells off." Varyana said when she glanced to Mara licking a peanut and trying to bite it.

"Oh." Mara pulled off the shell and asked, "Do I eat the papery stuff?"

"I do not think it matters." Varyana replied. She looked across the room to some mounted urgal horns, then her heart dropped when she saw a dragon skull; she could only hope Mara would not notice.

"I like peanuts!" Mara decided.

Murtagh soon returned, and Morzan placed the Alagaesian equivalent of 200 dollars on the table. "Every time you mess up, I deplete your tip." he said with a smirk. "This is from shouting at me." He removed the equivalent of thirty dollars, then eagerly he accepted his vodka.

"Oh! It's Lydia and Durza!" Elspeth recognized the gothic couple while she turned around to look toward the far end of the restaurant. They looked strangely out of place at the steak house, especially Durza, who did not look too comfortable here.

Lydia waved; she and Durza already had their food, but she would plan to stop by to say hello later.

"Oh, great. It's him." Morzan said as Barst entered the restaurant. "Anyway," he looked back to Murtagh, "I want steak. So does Mara, except he wants a kid's meal. Cook mine more than his."

"Steak for me too." said Varyana.

Morzan ordered for Elspeth, "And chicken something."

Varyana rolled her eyes, and Elspeth gave some better detail.

The four chose their sides, then Morzan stated after Murtagh left, "I need to talk to Eragon." Before Elspeth could stop him, he headed to the bar and knocked off Eragon's cowboy hat.

"You. Bastard-child. Why does Murtagh work here? I must know!" Morzan exclaimed.

Eragon scowled and retrieved his hat. "Why should I tell you? You're evil, and I hate you."

Morzan grabbed the hat and threw it down again. "Tell me!"

"Quit taking my hat! You're so weird." Eragon reclaimed the hat and kept a tight grasp on it. "If you must know, he is saving money to buy good eye liner. Emo things, you know. A trench coat. TRIPP pants. The chains on his last pair broke." Eragon sighed and smiled. "Chains.."

"Please don't tell me your bondage fantasies." Morzan said and walked off, shaking his head.

"Your son is too hot." Eragon sighed again and crossed his arms over the bar.

Time passed, and all was well until Morzan was drunk.

"Epsleth! Slpespth, they have margariatas!" he exclaimed.

"Hm?" She opened her menu and laughed softly. "Morzan, that says marinara. Marinara cheese sticks."

"No, it says margarita and cheese sticks. I know how to read." Morzan replied.

"They don't have margaritas! You're drunk." Elspeth tried to express.

"I want a margarita!"

"They don't /have/ margaritas!"

"I'll go get one!"

Elspeth flipped through the alcoholic beverage menu and declared, "They don't have margaritas, Morzan!"

"I want one!"

"Morzan. Love. Listen to me. They don't have - What are you doing!" She frowned as Morzan got up and left the table. She sighed and muttered, "Whatever."

At the bar, the employee tried to explain they had no margaritas, but Morzan did not believe him. It stressed both of them out; meanwhile Eragon headed toward a hall, knocking down a sign in the process. Quickly he picked it up and placed it back on the wooden wall, glancing around nervously, hoping no one saw it. The arrow sign was now backwards, and he carried on in the wrong direction.

"This is a really weird bathroom." Eragon frowned, crossing his arms and shivering. The door closed behind him, and as he spun around, he realized it obviously was not a bathroom. He reached for the handle, and it broke off in his hand. With a look of horror, he tried to shove it back in, but he had no luck in repairing it. He tried to cast a spell, but nothing happened. Other magic had no effect in a magical freezer.

He brought his hands to his face but tried not to panic. Someone would come check the freezer any minute now, clearly! He wouldn't have to wait long!

/Saphira! Saphira!/ he tried to contact her, but his connection with her had been cut.

"Well, fuck you!" Morzan shouted at the bartender. He came up with the idea he could find margaritas if he found the place's freezer, so he sent himself on a quest. For some reason the path leading opposite the path to where a sign indicated a bathroom was actually the bathroom, so he headed back and took the other route, stepping into the freezer.

"Morzan! Oh, I'm glad someone showed up. I - " Eragon's smile swiftly fell when the door closed behind Morzan.

Morzan felt dread from witnessing Eragon's reaction. Slowly he turned and pushed on the door.

"Don't hurt me!" Eragon exclaimed. He watched Morzan continue trying to get the door open, but there was only failure.

"D-don't hurt me." Eragon repeated. He put as much distance between himself and Morzan as possible. "W-we'll just wait for someone to to show up, and you don't let the door close again!"

"Oh, what is taking Morzan so long?" Elspeth grumbled. "Mara, find out what he's doing. He left the bar."

"He's not answering me. It's normal though; sometimes the connection breaks when he's drunk." Mara said.

Murtagh brought their food, relieved Morzan wasn't at the table. Elspeth thanked him, took a few bites of her chicken, then traveled to Lydia's table.

"Hello, Lydia! Durza, could you conjure a margarita for Morzan? He's being drunk and irritating. I would really appreciate it."

Durza replied, "Perhaps.. Conjuring any drink is tricky, but I could probably manage. The best bet would be to transfigure a different drink." He picked up the alcoholic drink menu, and Lydia left due to a need to reapply her lipstick.

"If you weren't completely retarded, this would not have happened!" Morzan exclaimed, having abandoned his place near the door in favor of terrifying Eragon.

"I didn't do it on purpose! You're so mean! Quit yelling at me!" begged Eragon.

"Don't you dare tell me what the fuck to do!" Morzan exclaimed.

"Hey, guys!" Lydia greeted them. "What are - "

"The door!" Eragon screamed. It closed.

The manager approached Murtagh, asking him to take over a table for a waitress being harassed by Barst. With a groan he obliged, slowly approaching with a beer to deliver.

"You are one ugly girl." said Barst.

"I am male." Murtagh mumbled.

"Yeah, the cuts on your wrist are so manly. What was I thinking?" Barst asked.

Murtagh dropped his notepad. Slowly he pulled his sleeves down, shaking his head in disbelief. "That's... that's too far. You don't know - "

"I don't know what? I know much more than you think. Now bring me my damn steak before I open those scars on your other wrist." Barst laughed as Murtagh began to cry. "That's right, go cry to your momma! Oh wait.. She's dead! Hahahaaa!"

Elspeth came to the rescue, pulling Murtagh into a hug and glaring at Barst. "How dare you! Murtagh has done nothing to wrong you! Shh, Murtagh, it's alright.."

"I just want the waitress with the nice ass back." Barst said with an indifferent shrug. "You'll definitely do though.."

"Don't even think about touching me." Elspeth snapped. She patted Murtagh's back and began to lead him to a table to sit down, but he pulled away and mumbled an apology.

"Oh, Murtagh, there's nothing to be sorry about." She frowned as he sobbed and rushed to a hallway.

Tears blurred his vision, and he was too upset to realize he was going the wrong way as he lit a cigarette. He entered the freezer, and he flinched when Eragon screamed, "Hold the door!"

"Close the door?" Murtagh asked, letting it fall behind him.

Eragon's vision dropped to the floor, and Murtagh asked, "What happened to you?"

"Your dad beat me up.. I think he broke my nose.." Eragon answered, rubbing some blood off his face.

"Good going, Murtagh. Now we're never getting out of here!" Morzan said. "You're worthless."

Murtagh sat down with his cigarette and replied, "I know. You tell me.. every.. day.." He stifled a sob and wiped his tears on his hand.

"It's so cold in here!" Eragon complained.

"N-not as cold as my soul..." Murtagh whispered.

"Quit your bitching!" Morzan demanded. "Murtagh! Quit crying! You're so damn embarrasing!"

"Don't yell at him; you're making it worse." Lydia said while she tried to cast magic on the door.

"It's so! So! Cold!" Eragon exclaimed, wandering around with his arms crossed. "MURTAGH! LET'S CUDDLE! FOR WARMTH!"

Murtagh said, "I would rather freeze to death than touch you or ANYONE."

"Heyy!" Eragon's eyes brightened, and he reached for a thermostat. He began to adjust it, and as Morzan strode toward him, it broke.

Eragon turned and smiled up to Morzan. "Now we won't freeze to death!"

Morzan shoved Eragon out of the way and looked at the thermostat. "You. Fuckin. Retard."

"What? What's wrong?" Lydia asked, making her way to the wall. Her question was answered as the room swiftly became very hot. She sighed and looked at Eragon then walked around the space. "You see the meat, Eragon? It's going to rot now."

Eragon ran from Morzan and began banging his fists on the door and crying out for help.

"Murtagh.." Morzan whispered, slowly approaching him. "You work here. Why.. Did you close.. the door.."

Murtagh answered, "Don't talk to me." His eyes remained on his cigarette, and fortunately his crying had calmed.

"Why the fuck do you work here and not know where things are?!" Morzan shouted.

"I said don't talk to me!"

Eragon screamed, "We're going to DIE!" He broke down crying, now lying on the floor.

"Get up!" Morzan turned to Eragon and began kicking his face. "You're not helping! You!" He looked to Lydia and demanded, "You're the necromancer! Summon something!"

"How is that going to help?" she asked, fanning herself with a paper she had found.

"Ohh.. Murtagh.. You're so sweaty now.." said Eragon. "You should strip."

Lydia continued, "Everyone should just calm down. Especially Eragon. You're scaring Murtagh."

Eragon said, "At least Barst isn't here."

At that moment the door opened, and Barst entered, slamming the door behind himself. He began complaining about the service of the restaurant, and toward the end of the rant, Murtagh flipped him off, and in return Barst gave him a black eye.

"What do you mean, we're trapped?" he shouted at Eragon.

"Morzan changed the sign!" Eragon exclaimed.

"What? I did not!"

"How do you know? You're drunk!" Eragon said.

"Both of you just shut up!" Lydia shouted. "Ugh, the heat and the yelling gives me an awful headache."

"What are we supposed to do about the meat? It already smells awful!" Morzan sighed.

"Come help me move the meat into this storage closet thing." Eragon suggested. Morzan, Murtagh, and Eragon embarked on this task, and Lydia told Barst, "Go help them."

"I don't work here. I don't have to do a damn thing to help anyone but myself." Barst said and worked on assaulting the door with his mace, but even he made no progress.

Lydia aided Murtagh, Morzan, and Eragon, and soon Barst approached them to harass, missing the opportunity to save the door as Durza and Elspeth entered, along with Mara and Varyana.

"Nooo!" Eragon cried out.

"Yes!" Morzan exclaimed upon seeing the margarita in Elspeth's hand.

"You're welcome." said Durza as Morzan rushed to take the drink. "Why is it so hot in here?"

"Durza!" Lydia smiled and stepped over to him. She explained the situation, and he responded, "Really.. Wow. I knew we should not have eaten here. Of course, as soon as Eragon entered, I knew things would end horribly. Foolishness does follow him wherever he goes."

"How did you know it's my fault?" Eragon asked with a glare.

"How could I not know?" Durza replied.

"I hate you." said Eragon.

"Thank you." Durza turned his attention to the door. "Hm.."

"Eragon, what happened to your nose?" Elspeth asked, approaching him and frowning.

"Him! Him!" Eragon pointed dramatically at Morzan. "He hit me! Several times! He's a bad man!"

"You deserve it. Finally Morzan does something right." Barst said. He began to contemplate what he could do to get them out of this mess, but it was hopeless.

"The only thing to do is wait." Durza proclaimed, sitting with Lydia. She was perfectly happy to be anywhere as long as she was with him, but he was very irritated.

The meat, though rotting, pleased the dragons, and Eragon managed to take a nap.

"This is ridiculous." Barst stated after a few hours. He paced the room, and he stopped to examine something on a wall. "Did anyone think to press this?" he asked. He tapped a device on the wall, and the magic meant to sustain the freezer lifted.

Eragon sat up and stated, "Oh.. I feel kinda stupid."

"You are kinda stupid!" Barst shouted, tossing his mace in Eragon's direction. Eragon shrieked and dodged it by collapsing to the floor. The mace soared into the freezer door, and it opened.

Murtagh rose to step out, but Morzan roughly shoved him out of the way and exited first. The others followed, and they all experienced a confusion unlike anything they had ever felt.

"What.." Eragon's heart pounded as he looked around.

Elspeth reached for Morzan's hand; instinctually she felt threatened by the change, and she looked up to see Morzan's reaction. He did not look frightened, just shocked. "Morzan?"

"I think we're.."

Barst finished for him, "In the future."

Slowly the group stepped around a counter and watched strangely dressed people pass by. Elspeth coughed from the terrible stench of a place nearby labeled, 'Abercrombie and Fitch.' She turned to observe where they had just came from - 'Orange Julius.'

Quickly the crowds thinned out; the place was closing. What evils could it hold at night?


End file.
